How To Live To 100
And other lessons from an infant and a centenarian
A few weeks ago we retired the Reader Of The Week. We felt like it was old hat and that no one really cared about it anymore. Which made us sad. But then we got on a phone call with Friend Of RWC, Julia Green, who told us that she was a big fan of the newsletter and pitched the idea we write about below. We told her we would do it and make her Reader Of The Week and we are men of our word. Thank you Julia.
Also starting now, Reader Of The Week is officially retired again. Don’t even try it.
Ryan: Stephen. Hello again.
Stephen: Ryan, hello. It’s been a while. Please allow me to dust off my keyboard.
RS: It’s been a few weeks. You and I talked about doing one last week, but we decided we didn’t have anything good to say. Too much “dicking around” I believe is what I said.
SK: You said we couldn’t do a newsletter unless we had something to actually say or share to the world. It couldn’t be about groundhogs. It had to be of substance and meaning. Which is what we have today.
RS: That’s right, today we will be talking about MILESTONES. You and I recently celebrated milestones. Or were a part of someone else’s Milestone. Tell the people.
SK: We are lucky to know both one of the youngest and one of the oldest people (persons?) on this world. And both of these people celebrated their birthdays a few weeks ago. My daughter Lowell turned one and your Grandmother turned 100. The duality of woman!
I would like to examine, briefly, what these milestones are all about in each of their lives. How does that sound?
RS: I think that sounds great. Life Lessons From One to One Hundred. The way this will work…I guess I don’t need to explain how it will work, you’ll just keep reading and you’ll see how it works.
Anyway, your daughter turned one, a beautiful age. Tiny little sponges sopping up your twisted wisdom. But, I’m sure you’ve learned just as much from her, right? Give me a few life lessons you’ve taken away from your daughter and her infinite child’s wonder.
SK: LESSON 1: WATCH/THINK BEFORE YOU SPEAK/DO ANYTHING
Lowell can’t really talk, Ryan. She has a few words that she uses at a rather liberal interval, but otherwise she isn’t stringing anything together of substance. Which is fine. The thing she does, though, is she intently watches you as you speak or really do anything interesting. I can see the little wheels in her little brain turn and then she will try to replicate the sound or motion. It’s very fun to see and is a nice reminder to shut the hell up, listen, and then act (if you want).
Now please tell me something you’ve learned from your Grandmother’s incredibly long life.
RS: STICK TO YOUR GUNS
My grandma was born in Shanghai in 1926. She has been old for as long as I’ve known her, so it’s hard for me to imagine her as anything other than 100. But she used to be our age, and she came to the states in the late 50s when she was in her early 30s. Now, Steve, I’d like you to imagine your life as it is now and then saying “fuck this, I’m leaving” and then going to a country where you don’t speak the language and starting over. It’s insane to me. That’s what my grandma did, but she didn’t have google or a smart phone or anything else to really tell her what that was going to be like or what she was going to do. And then from there she went and she built a little life. First in New York, then in Los Angeles. Today, I find her to be a pretty funny, stubborn lady that doesn’t really like to leave the house, but some 70 years ago she had a big idea to come all the way to America and figure it out. It’s beautiful really.
Is that a lesson? I didn’t really put as nice of a bow on it as you did. People probably understand, though, right?
SK: I think instead of STICK TO YOUR GUNS this is maybe BET ON YOURSELF.
RS: There it is, go ahead. Bet on yourself. Also, one of the last times I asked her why she decided to leave China she just said “communism” which is also a pretty badass response.
SK: She didn’t like it so she left. We could all learn something from that.
Okay, time for LESSON TWO: EMBRACE AWE
Every time a plane flies overhead, Lowell will either touch her ears to signal she can hear it or point up to the sky if she can see it. Planes fill her with wonder and delight, whereas they fill me with anger about noise pollution. But really, planes are quite something, Ryan. This aluminum capsules ripping us around the world for relatively cheap. My daughter understands this and literally points it out. She is allowing awe into her life and I can see it makes her incredibly happy.
We should all be left in awe more often. It doesn’t need to be sunset in the Grand Canyon (though that is something everyone should try to see). It can be as simple as noticing a dandelion in a mess of weeds in the park. But it must be done. We must find awe.
RS: When was the last time you experienced joy? Wonder?
SK: Obviously the birth of my child was quite the joyous and wondrous experience. On a smaller note, I went for a jog last weekend on some local trails and it was 55 degrees, sunny, and I found myself full of something that felt real nice.
And you?
RS: Wow. Pure joy.
SK: Don’t overthink it. It can be some quotidian moment that brought you a smile.
RS: Alright. I was in Los Angeles last week because of the aforementioned birthday. On my last evening there I went to dinner with my parents. It was a nice restaurant around the corner from their house. We enjoyed a very nice meal and the three of us all had a great time. Does that count?
SK: I think that counts. We will count it.
RS: Thank god. I was close to stealing yours and saying I enjoyed running in the sunshine.
You probably want one more lesson out of my dear old grandma, eh?
SK: Let’s wrap this up and let these people go.
RS: I’m going to directly contradict the lesson from Lowell: DON’T THINK
My grandma is pretty unfiltered. When people hear that I have a 100 year old grandma they always ask me how she’s doing, as if she’s a mummy we keep in the corner of our house. I always tell them that she’s sharp as a tack. This mostly comes at the expense of the people that she knows. She’s asking us hard hitting questions all the time: when we’re going to get jobs, or have kids, or find significant others. If you’ve gained weight, she will tell you. If you’ve lost weight, she will also tell you. If she is eating something that displeases her, she will spit it out immediately. If you are someone on the street who is pregnant, she will look at you and declare the gender of the child you’re carrying. “It’s a boy,” is probably a terrifying thing to hear from someone that looks like her. When she is ready to go home, she will stand up and say, “I am ready to go home,” and one of us needs to get her out of there ASAP. All of that to say, that she gets what she wants and let’s people know what she thinks all of the time. Something we could all probably do a little bit more of.
That actually feels like a bad lesson. Maybe I drew the wrong conclusion. You know what I mean. Take from that what you will.
SK: I think the lesson is less about not thinking and more about being deliberate. It also goes back to our first lesson from Grandma which is to trust thyself.
RS: DON’T BE FAKE. BE REAL.
SK: In summary we have learned to THINK BEFORE SPEAKING, DON’T OVERTHINK, EMBRACE AWE, AND TRUST YOUR VISION.
These are printed in an italicized bold font (like above) and taped on the wall in someone who is about to go Founder Mode.
RS: Do you think you want to live to be 100?
SK: I don’t think anyone would want to deal with me at that age. I’d be okay checking out a bit before then.
RS: Which is what we should let our readers do. Until next time folks. Please unsubscribe.
Fun read! And interesting observations
I enjoyed this!!